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Moon, Light and Shadow

ART, POETRY, LOVE – THE MAGIC OF JOURNEYS

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The Future

Under The Banyan Tree

Last night I feel asleep with the TV on. It’s not something I like to do because I believe I am unable fall into a deep restful sleep if there is a flickering screen with continuous voices. But I was watching the animated series, Avatar, which I enjoy very much, and didn’t realise I’d fallen asleep, In the middle of the night I woke up, and the episode that was on, was the one in which Aang and his friends meet a waterbending master from the Foggy Swamp Tribe called Huu, who tells them:

“I reached enlightenment right here under the banyan grove tree. I hear it callin’ me, just like you did. See this whole swamp is actually just one tree spread out over miles… branches, spread and sink and take root and then spread some more – one big living organism, just like the entire world.

You think you’re any different from me? Or your friends‌? Or this tree‌? If you listen hard enough you can hear every living thing breathing together, you can feel everything growing. We’re all livin’ together, even if most folks don’t act like it. We all have the same roots, and we are all branches of the same tree.”

That is actually how I feel about everything and everyone around me. At the end of my last yoga class, our teacher gave us a little deck of cards to choose one from, which would be a personal message from the universe. I smiled when I read my message. It was one word: Freedom.

Sometimes it’s so sad: There are so many little signs, methods, practices, and ways of thinking that can help people, but most don’t know of them. It’s a way of life that has been unlearned over the history of mankind, generation after generation. Maybe that’s why so many people are lost. But I do have hope for our future. Many people are seeking truth, and yearning for ‘something’ they know they need even though they don’t know how to find it, or what ‘it’ is. They’re looking, which is enough for now.

I’ve always asked questions, always wondered and worried about the things I didn’t know and was always afraid because I could not understand the strange emptiness I felt sometimes. But, like I said, I’ve always been looking and I’m happy with the progress I’ve made over the years. Makes the future seem mysterious and exciting and vast!

I honestly wish the same for everyone, after all, we ARE all connected, in ways we are yet to understand, and what affects one, affects all. 🙂

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The Phoenix Gate

I spoon another mouthful of strawberries, whipped cream and sorbet into my mouth, listening to Adele’s voice as I would to the voice of an old dear friend. The guy at the counter is asking for rainbow sprinkles and I smile to myself thinking of the little things that make us happy, the little things that comfort us by reminding us of another time.

I signed on to my blog half an hour ago determined to start writing immediately before I got distracted by reading what my friends in the bloggosphere have written. I formed these friendships over the seven years I’ve been blogging. Some of you have become dear friends and some of you have disappeared, as bloggers tend to do when life throws life at them. My own blog has transformed herself twice since 2007 and here I am again, at the crossroads. The difference today is that Moon, Light and Shadow will remain what she is: a beautiful and important part of me; a testament of sorts to everything I love and everything I am.

Life continuously evolves and new roads are meant to be explored wholly and completely. To do anything else would be to be so much less. But to understand where I have come from and to connect with and cherish all that I have become along the way is a gift which both moves and frightens me. I am in awe of it and humbled to think it belongs to me.

I’m standing at the Gate with my loved ones beside me, my memories safely in my back pocket and a real future is finally in front of me. I am in love with my life. Thank you all for being a part of it.

I Only Wish You Love

There you go again,
chasing down that road.
I’ve held your hand
and watched you do this,
time and time before.
Now this time has come,
and you can walk alone.
I won’t right you when you stumble
Nor catch you when you fall.
I won’t kiss or hug away the hurt
from bumps or bruises.
This time, on my own and from afar,
 I’ll celebrate your joys
and mourn for you your losses.
Fare thee well, my friend,
as every time before,
I only wish you love.

What’s In A Year?

 

December 31st, a day for setting resolutions and goals, is fast approaching and I’m overflowing with blog post ideas: December 21st and the ‘end of the world as we know it’; A possible explanation for my missing Farewell to 2011 post; My 2012 Wrap Up; What 2013 means to me; and many more. But right now, more than anything, I find myself ready for some peace of mind. If there is one thing I’ve done a lot of this year is THINK. I’ve analyzed EVERYTHING: the past, the present, the future, my behaviour, the behaviour of others, and supposed meanings in everything around me. It’s time for some quiet. So, I’m covering everything today. All these thoughts running rampant in my brain are coming out now. So, on with the show!
December 21st and the ‘end of the world as we know it’
Last week, on the drive to the airport it was the hot topic. To me, the big change is the shift in collective consciousness. Of course this is a shift that has been happening for decades and it will continue to shift for a few more decades. This year simply marked an acceleration. For the first time in the history of humanity as we know it there is a global network unlike any other. Almost 35% of the people on the planet have Internet access. Almost 85% of the global population is literate. Information is shared in a way it never has been before, through the Internet, television, radio and print media. And, even though much of this ‘information’ is insubstantial and as far as I see it, rubbish, I cannot deny that I’ve seen people who are trying. I see those who are making a difference in the world by helping others, by teaching, and by doing their part to make the world a better place. Those are the ones who give me hope. That is the collective shift that I am talking about. I see more and more like minded people making connections and working together for common goals. It’s exciting and encouraging.
My missing ‘Farewell to 2011’ post
By December 2011 I’d been going to a psychotherapist for a little over a month. After an unnerving end to an unhealthy relationship I realized that I was at a point where I had to figure out how I’d reached a point in my life where I felt it was acceptable for me to deem myself unworthy of, well, more. When the time came to write my end of year post, all I would do was re-read my end of 2010 post and wonder where I went. A friend told me that I had already accomplished so much, just by standing up for myself and having the courage to try to understand my life and to change it. He was right, but at the time, I felt broken and unsure and quite frankly, terrified. I didn’t know whether or not I could do it. Changing a core belief from a negative one to a positive one after almost three decades of reinforcement seemed an insurmountable task. Looking back on it now, I would say that if there was anything at all I accomplished for 2011, it was that I took a hold of myself. I made ME my first priority and I knew for sure that no matter what was revealed to me and where my journey led, I wasn’t going to quit.
2012 Wrap Up
It’s fitting that this would be called a Wrap Up. Like they say in the film industry: “That’s a wrap!” It’s been one helluva year. A few weeks before my birthday in November I was talking to a friend and I said to him that I was as much as 90% happy with my life. I am surrounded by people who I genuinely care for and am genuinely cared for: a loving family and friends I respect and have so much fun with. I can afford to pay my bills and have enough to enjoy going out for dinner or meeting friends to share a bottle or two of wine. I made a commitment to myself to leave an unsatisfying job no matter what, and I reaffirmed my choice to make Luna Surya Studios a place for creativity and healing. I learned to love and respect myself in a way I never have before. I’ve come to an understanding about my history and I see all the potential that it has. I’ve learned to love all the shadowy corners of me and embrace all the light in me. I am truly grateful for my life and for all my gifts. At the very beginning of 2012 I remember saying that this was a year for change. This was to be a year to understand what was not healthy for me and to learn to let go. It was a year for improvement. It has been, with all the remarkable, painful, surprising and incredible lessons that such change brings with it. This has been, truly, an amazing year, and I am humbled with gratitude for having had it.
What 2013 means to me:
So here I am on the threshold of a new year and for once it really does feel like an ending and a beginning. I know that change will continue, as it is in life’s nature to do so. I’m OK with that. I am stronger than I’ve ever been I think and I get butterflies in my stomach when I think of POSSIBILITIES. My world is open. My future is open. 2012 was a year of soul searching, learning, lessons and revelations. I think for now, I can say that for 2013 my goal is to Be Present. I am grateful for the past, it is my teacher, and I look forward to the future, it is my destiny. But today, I’ll make another promise to myself: I’m going to enjoy my present. I’m going to spend time with those I love, enjoying the things that make me happy: books, food, laughing, flowers, body scrubs, being healthy, art, music, writing, photography, nature walks, and my Studio. I’m going to have fun, go crazy and embrace life in a way I haven’t before. I’m going to BE PRESENT. I’ve earned it.

Week Of Rainbows

“May I never miss a sunset or a rainbow because I am looking down.” 
Rainbow over the Anchorage
Almost every day last week I spotted rainbows. On my way to and from work mostly.

In the boatyard near my office

Above the boatyard next to ours

A friend sent me a link to beautiful photos of Moonbows,
a phenomenon I did not know existed.

On Friday, my last day of work for 2012
In flight, just after take off on my way to Florida.
The dark spot on the lower left is the shadow of the plane
and it is encircled by a rainbow.

First rainbow in West Palm Beach outside my Mom’s apartment.
Rainbows have been symbols of hope and new beginnings throughout time, and seeing one has always made me smile. I photograph rainbows whenever an opportunity presents itself and seeing five rainbows in a week seems too important a symbol to ignore. So I did some research. The Symbolism of the rainbow is both rich and ancient.

A rainbow can symbolize a bridge between the spiritual realm and the realm of matter below. Or it can represent a journey’s end. The leprechaun’s legendary and mystical “pot of gold” is to be found at the end of the rainbow. Noah saw a rainbow at the end of the great and turbulent flood which signified the end of his voyage and a return to calmness and peace. In this respect the rainbow is also a symbol for cleansing.

As the rainbow only appears after stormy skies, it is a symbol for the restoration of cosmic order. And, just as turbulent storms are necessary for nature to cleanse and feed the Earth, so too are emotional storms necessary in our lives in order to cleanse away our burdens and feed our souls. In this respect the rainbow also symbolizes the peace and calmness which comes to us at the end of unsettling periods of our lives.

This last interpretation, for me was particularly beautiful. I believe that glimpsing so many rainbows in just a few days could not be simply by chance (or weather systems). I’ve been weighed down lately by several emotional situations and trying very hard to deal with them properly and move on in a healthy way. For me, these rainbows are reminders to have faith in myself, my path and my future. 

Rainbow research source: Joseph Panek

Each Star On His Own Time

Some stars emerge in flash of brilliance
but will only burn half as long.
Some stars gather and gleam,
marking their own path as they go,
and will leave a lasting imprint on the pages of time.
book-746138_960_720
Dedicated to Book.

Moonchild

I do not Define myself by how many roadblocks have appeared in my path.
I define myself by the Courage I’ve found to forge new roads.
I do not define myself by how many disappointments I’ve faced.
I define myself by the Forgiveness and the Faith I have found to begin again.
I do not define myself by how long a relationship lasted.
I define myself by how much I have Loved, and been willing to Love again.
I do not define myself by how many times I have been knocked down.
I define myself by how many times I have struggled to my feet.
I am not my Pain.
I am not my Past.
I am that which has emerged from the Fire. ♥
~ Author Unknown

Luna Means Light

Photographed at 4:48am, 4th Dec 2012

Originally posted on March 9th 2011 Sometimes it’s good to glance back at where you came from so can remind yourself where you are going. 🙂

I’d just arrived at home after a really agonizing day at work. That day I was finding it particularly difficult to concentrate and thus do anything well. A social issue also bogged me down and by the time I left the office and was on my way home, I felt so heavy, drained, uninspired and simply wanted to crawl into my bed and curl myself into a little ball.
I sat despondent on my couch with the TV on when I got a text message from a good friend who wanted to know if I would like to meet up for a drink after yoga. When I told him I wasn’t going to yoga class that day and explained why, his reply was perfect:
“Hmm, well sounds like you had a tough day. Don’t worry about work, it’ll sort itself out tomorrow. In terms of that ‘social issue’, you already know what’s best for you. But I know you, and frankly you sound like you just might be feeling a little sorry for yourself.”
THAT made me sit up. The one thing I can’t stand is people feeling sorry for themselves. It’s perfectly understandable to vent frustrations and cry when things are bad. But wallowing in self pity has always been something that’s difficult for me to understand. And there I was, WALLOWING. I jumped into the shower and was in my car, heading to class in fifteen minutes.
I called my friend to say we could meet after class and thanked him for waking me up a bit. He said that he didn’t wake me up, that I know what I’m about and who I am, and it’s ok to forget sometimes.
“I know,” I told him, “I’m Luna. I’m a Light. Luna means Light.”
“Exactly!”
I arrived at the Studio, minutes before class and our Yoga Teacher was handing out pieces of paper, instructing us to write a ‘love’ letter to ourselves, declaring what we liked about ourselves. She said, ‘just go with it, really big-up yourselves’. I took that to mean, write the best YOU, you know you are. I stretched out on my tummy and began. We had one minute, after which we’d put the letter under our mats and began.
It was a great class that day. Just goes to show, when you push yourself to do something good for you, the rewards are limitless. This term we have been working on cleansing our bodies/minds/spirits of toxins, tension, and other agents that negatively impact upon our health and wellbeing, and inviting positive thought and behaviour patterns. “As we think, so we are.”
The following quote is what I wrote to myself. Now, I post it here for you. As you think, so you are also:
To my friend, – your deepest truest self, soon to be shown on the outside as well as within:
You are a light – bright, warm, welcoming, honest and brilliant.
You surround yourself and those around you with hope, magic, love and laughter.
You give comfort when it is needed and teach others to see the beauty in themselves and all around us.
You are respectful of life – your life, life around you in others, in all plants and animals, and our beautiful earth and cosmos.
You are truly part of the divine whole, easily recognizing and calling out the divine in others, and from the brightest light of all, which connects everything.
You are born from this light and will always be a part of that place that exists within all of us, in the wish part of our brain.
Whatever you believe, you can create and make it so.
Shine On!!

The Warrior Poet Awakes

Cold soles tread across sun warmed tiles
As my mind treads murky water.
A half moon rises to scale these walls,
Are you to be my muse?
Lights twinkle at me across the way
Reminding me a new saviour is born.
There is no need of one this time
As the cursor blinks at magic hour.

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